Gutting It Out

My Ex's Dad used to have this expression: "Gut It Out." Meaning that whenever life got tough, you just had to push through. Gut it out. I feel that way about this script I'm working on right now. As I've gotten older, I started making all sorts of excuses.

Here are a few of my favorites/most used:

I'm tired.

I wrote yesterday.

It's terrible.

I have to go to the gym.

I don't know how good this is.

Wendy Williams is on.

The View is on.

Project Runway is on.

Bethanny Ever After...

My boyfriend needs me to stay in bed.

My boyfriend needs a blow job.

My boyfriend needs me to make him lunch.

I have no idea what comes next.

When it comes down to it, I just need to gut it out and push through. Because all of those excuses amount to uncertainty. Every time I sit down to write something new, it's like I've never written before. Isn't that weird? I have decades of writing experience. I have an MFA. I have readings, productions and workshops behind me. I used to work with writers developing their material. I've read hundreds of scripts. But when it comes down to writing something new, it's like I have none of that experience.

So while I might forget how to write, I can't forget that this is what I go through every time. The bottom line is that it's bullshit. I do know how to write. So, in the moment, I just have to pretend I know what I'm doing until I remember that I do know what I'm doing.

And that involves Gutting It Out.

That's why I like this blog (when I actually get down to writing). I just start writing whatever is on my mind. It just gets my fingers warmed up. And sometimes that's all I can do. Just get my fingers moving. I type at least 70 WPM. I just need to get my fingers moving and then the brain catches up with the activity of my fingers. Then before I know it, without thinking about it (this is key), I'm writing.

One page. Then another. And another and another and another. And before I know it, I'm done with a scene.

Then I have to remember how to do it again.

And so on and so on. Like that old shampoo commercial.

Gut. It. Out.