Already?

My friends are starting to set me up. And I guess that's fine in terms of moving on. But have they been holding out on me all of this time? Did they have a secret list of guys they wanted to set me up with in case I broke up with the boyfriend and now all of a sudden the floodgates have opened?

My best friend always said her sister knew Marc Jacobs and she had him on speed dial in case I ever broke up. She always said this whenever I called her for a drink. Because I never called her up for a drink unless I had a problem with the boyfriend. But to be fair, she didn't call me much either. No hard feelings. Just fact. Yes, I do live in a world where it is POSSIBLE that someone I know knows Marc Jacobs. What's NOT possible is Marc Jacobs (the new, improved Marc Jacobs) ever looking at me twice. I mean, have you seen his boyfriend? Go to Perez Hilton, then come back.

This is not me being hard on myself. I give great face - YOU'VE seen it. But the body needs some fine tuning. I am comfortable enough with myself to know that. Face: amazing. Body: good.

But it was always a nice thought.

URBAN MYTH: Marc Jacobs waiting around for me with a cashmere hoodie in one hand and gym membership to Equinox in the other.

Dating Marc Jacobs would be motivation to get the pounds off for sure.

A friend of an ex-boyfriend already sent me a friend request on Facebook. I'm not sure how much I trust his judgment, but it was a sweet gesture. The ex's teeth weren't that great and neither are this guy's. It's the thought that counts, I guess.

Another friend I had lunch with asked me if I wanted to date her 23 year-old mixed race intern or babysitter or something. She showed me a picture and he's hot. But even though I'm NOT 23, I'm supposed to be the 23 year-old mixed race guy in a relationship. I mean, have you SEEN my pic. That's your second hint, go look at it if you haven't yet. Scroll or click or whateve.r

And then my friend told me about another guy over drinks last night. He's 41, good looking, white, a professional in the entertainment business who works for a major studio and he's really nice. But she wasn't sure if we're the same type. I saw that look on her face that most heterosexual's have when they're confused about how gay relationships work. I recognized that look.

"You're trying to figure out who's the woman, aren't you?"

"Yeah. Is that bad?"

And it's not bad, I told her. It's just what straight people know. There's a man and a woman. And apparently the woman is more gentle and understanding. I was definitely the woman in that regard in my past relationship. My ex's Mom even went as far to tell me one year after hanging out with her grandson that I would make an excellent mother. And if that's the case and her son as the "man" is the opposite of that...what the hell is she saying about her son without saying it.

And for the record, that is no correlation to who's the top or the bottom, as I told my friend last night.

So I told my friend to give her friend my phone number or to look me up on Facebook. If he's interested in dating a mixed race guy who LOOKS 23 (HEY! I'm getting over a break up, if I want to be deluded, I'm allowed for the next two weeks), then he should look and see if he likes what he sees. But apparently he's been dating younger and younger, but isn't necessarily interested in dating babies, so the only other question is:

"Does he date brown?" My friend's getting back to me.