Staycation

The Drummer is out of town this weekend with a friend.  They are road tripping to Arizona.  At first when he told me he was going, I kind of got pissed.  With everything going on with my family, I had this fantasy of spending time with him on Memorial Day.  Trust me, it would have been great.  I would have loved to have spent some time with him.  But I haven't exactly had time to get away and just take off, although I did drive up to Northern CA by myself last weekend (he was supposed to go, but forgot that he had a few gigs that weekend).  Then when he mentioned this trip very non chalantly, I lost my shit. I was annoyed that he was going away with someone else.  But he mentioned that my schedule had been crazy and that I was going away by myself.  Although let the record show that it was supposed to be the two of us, but he remembered that he had these gigs.

And he reminded me that I had these writing projects.  And I think he just wanted to get away.  I wish he had just been a bit more straight up because then he got on this train of thought saying that he had mentioned it to me.  I really don't respond to that sort of passive aggressive talk.  He knew he didn't mention it to me and I called him on it.  But when I got over my anger about it, I thought about the fact that I would have no obligation to anyone other than my Dad for a few days. 

He just left a couple of hours ago.  And I'm in our bed and really happy he's not here.  I have been feeling so neglectful of our relationship because I've been dealing with my Father's illness.  And I really have a shit ton of work to get done (which is why I'm blogging, obviously).  I love my boyfriend.  I think he might truly be one of the kindness people I've ever met.  And I love sleeping next to him. . But all of that wonderfulness is distracting.  It feels so much better to be around him and to suck his dick than it does to create some fantastic script out of the ether.  But if I can't have the dick, then I might as well be productive.  Although we did make up for it earlier by fucking like crazy and going though four different positions.  In the morning.  That should hold both of us over until Sunday.

So I'm going to get up early, which I always do when I'm by myself.  And I'm going to write. . And get a work out in and maybe go to the spa.  I'll probably go to bed relatively early tonight so that I'm refreshed.  I'm trying to be good to myself by sleeping as much as I can.  I feel like sleep completely changes my perspective of life.  Life seems hopeless if I'm sleep deprived.  What a difference an extra hour or two can make a night.  It feels good to give that gift to myself.

Then on Friday through Sunday when I don't have to be with my Dad as much, I can just luxuriate in having time to get my writing done.  I'm not one of those writers who talks about writing and doesn't write.  I just wrote a new play in three months. I'm writing this TV sample and then I'm going to write more TV stuff.  I like to keep a healthy amount of diet and exercise in my routine.  When it comes to being creative my diet is all the stuff I'm reading and watching. . It's my fuel.  And my exercise is my writing.  As long as I keep on my regimen of diet and exercise, I'm good to go.

Can't wait for my staycation.  I'll be romancing myself plenty.