Mojorama

This one is for Howie:

I went out last night by myself. I had planned to meet a friend of mine out, but had forgotten I didn't have his cell number. So I took a bit of a risk and decided to head out to MJ's by myself.

When I walked in the bar, I was kind of feeling myself. I looked good in my purple plaid shirt and jeans. I was smoking cigarettes (which I don't do that often anymore, for anyone who's about to comment). And the hair was kind of soft and sweeping. I knew I looked good.

So I'm having my first beer, watching the strippers, and looking out at the crowd. At this point, which is about 11 PM, it's not empty and it's not crowded. Lots of Silverlake types: ironic mustaches, acid washed jeans, tank tops, scruffy faces. And I smoke a cigarette. I don't see my friend anywhere. I guess he decided not to show up.

I get another beer. I decide that after this beer, I'm going to leave. I'm not feeling anxious, but I'm not feeling like I need to be out. PORN! It's like I'm a dog--SQUIRREL!

Porn on the big screen is an interesting proposition. Because it's blown up (pun intended) big, it's either GREAT if it's a good scene or it's THE WORST SHIT EVER if it's a bad scene. It magnifies what was good or bad about the scene originally. This is pretty good: a guy is blindfolded, his body is cut, he's blond and he's getting his cock teased by this guy, who then proceeds to blow him. Hotness.

So I do a few laps around the bar. Have a few more cigarettes. It's time to go. I'm half way done with my beer, then:

These two guys grab me.
1: "Hi."
2: "Hi."
Me: "Hey."
1: "You're cute."
2: "You're hot."
I smile politely.
1 unbuttons my shirt.
2 helps him.
1 grabs my head.
2 sticks his tongue down my throat.
1 opens my shirt.
2 licks my left nipple.
1 licks my right nipple.
2 grabs my junk.
1 grabs 2's junk.
I grab 1's junk.
1, 2 and me all start making out.
I think: "Is this really happening? I know it's dark, but I actually think these guys might be cute. And they're making out with me! This is amazing!"
I check my wallet. Whew! Still there.

I couldn't help but think this was some ploy to prey on innocent me and steal my money. Cute guys have never just grabbed me and made out with me. Okay, I know. They were a little tipsy. The one who had the blond hair and the scruffy beard was probably on something. And the other one, who I ended up talking to more, was at least buzzed.

We then separated ourselves. I think his name was Casey. I have his number. He's visiting from Oahu and was down in San Diego for a conference. He has a real job. I don't remember what it is. But he's cute. And in the light of the street lamp out front as we're smoking, I still think he's cute. We go have a smoke and meat this guy, Stan. Small, Hispanic, aggressive Stan. Cutting to the chase: they end up pulling their dicks out and start stroking each other. I kind of watch because even though I'm not opposed to a friendly stroke session in broad nightlight, I think it's wiser to enjoy the show. And this being a gay bar and a GOOD, FUN gay bar, everyone goes about their conversations without REALLY noticing. It was the hotness.

Stan suggests that we go home with him, only a block away and get down. Then his friends call him over and he leaves. Casey and I figure that he's forgotten about us. Then his friend Clint, the blond scruffy dude, texts him. He's in the car and he's waiting. Clint was fucking wasted, but at least he had the good sense to put himself to bed. In the car. I said good night to Casey (if that's his name) and I went home.

So maybe I see Casey before he leaves on Sunday. Maybe I don't. But it was a nice conversation with a cute guy, a little making out and a reminder that I can still have fun. I can have my mojo. I can have another guy who I'm testing the waters with. Life is full of variety and spontaneity. And it's another confirmation that when you take a risk, you can have unexpected, silly, dirty, hard on inducing rewards. And that's exactly what happened last night.

Then I went to bed, walked the dogs that I'm dogsitting and got a good night's sleep. What's on board for today?