Farewell Recap: My Friends

As a part of my farewell to this blog, I'm doing a bit of a recap of where I am on certain subjects. And when I'm finished, just like I did when I broke up with my ex, I'm gone.

But I promise to leave my forwarding address...which will be another blog about something besides my now 8 month old break up. I think it's time to move on.

TODAY'S SUBJECT:

My friends

My friends are the raddest ever. I'm making a pact with myself never to abandon my friends for a relationship. The trouble is that the ex didn't like any of them. He was threatened by their place in my life. That's troubling.

So who's in my life now?

People who support and love me. Smart people. People who challenge me and make life interesting, not just sycophants. Yes, I live in LA and I work in Hollywood, but I'm not of it. I think when you're a native, it isn't as romantic. And my best friend has been a working actress since we were kids. So I always saw things up close and personal since I was young.

Speaking of my best friend, she's this amazing human being who has seen me at every stage in my life. . She actually introduced me to my ex. But really saw how much I shrank during that relationship. And we made a pact never to let a guy get in the way again.

I have friends, like Vic and Steve, who have invited me into their home and who have really taken care of me at a time when it seemed like I couldn't take care of myself. Those early days, which seem so far away now, were monumentally difficult. I felt all sorts of guilt for leaving and at a time when I couldn't be strong, they loaned me some of their strength until I was strong enough to move on.

I have friends I make plans with now to do things. My friend Nicole and I take yoga together. Her Dad just died recently and my Dad's been having his own health issues, so it has been good to hang with her specifically for that reason. But doing yoga with Nic is also a crossover with the spiritual and physical work I'm doing.

Steve and I are addicted to our hip hop classes on Wednesday and Sundays. That actually has been a fun way to meet new people. I love it. And again, it's been something that's helped me build more confidence in my dancing and in my body. And it's just fun to be silly and listen to all of the 90s hip hop and R&B they play in class.

My friends are reminding me that I was fine before I met my ex. That I can be a smart playwright who went to NYU, but still love reality TV, pop music, and Ru Paul's Drag Race along with loving Woody Allen movies, documentaries, literature and the theatre. I've never been a snob when it came to culture and entertainment. And I don't think I only need to ingest "smart" things for people to know I'm smart.

Susan and I make sure we talk on a regular basis. She's having a kid with her husband and there are a lot of changes going on with her. But it's important as we go through life changing events in our lives to have friends who are there who knew us back when. Elyzabeth and I try to catch up and motivate each other to keep writing, given our respective busy schedules and her baby girl Gillian.

I had a bunch of friends who just came out to support my recent play reading. Karen and I are going to commit to going to more theatre. Emily's going to join Steve and I at hip hop. I have to reconnect with my friend Kelly and get together with her soon as well. I'm trying to find a friend who wants to go take those aerial fitness classes, although from what my friend Dave says, it'll be a good way to meet adventurous, fix and flexible guys. I am always up for that.

The other things I've already mentioned in these Farewell Recaps are opening up my life to having more people in it. Clearly SEX is one way to do that. But also my SPIRITUALITY is helping me on that journey to meet my soulmate. It's the inner work I have to do and it's not fabricated or a fad or an easy route. It's real deep integrated spiritual work that doesn't have to be called "spiritual work" for it to be effective. And of course, the BODY...it's not just about attracting people to me with my body. It's having more reasons to meet people that don't involve set ups or Grindr or the bars. It's about meeting people who share my interests and have something to talk about.

It all works together. And it's all working fine. So here's to meeting more interesting, well-read, funny, selfless, adorable friends...and maybe even lovers if that's what's meant to happen.